I need a job

Cartoon by Hugh MacLeod

In a recent post I announced that I would start profiling job seekers as a way to help.

One of the things I ask of them for these profiles is to one of the following questions (these were taken copied borrowed from the extensive list of questions that Google has been known to ask in interviews).

Following is how I would answer these questions if asked in an interview:

What is the most efficient way to sort a million integers?

Alphabetically.

Obviously.

Imagine you have a closet full of shirts. It’s very hard to find a shirt. So what can you do to organize your shirts for easy retrieval?

Ok. This is how I organize my shirts:

Clean: On hangars in the closet.

Dirty: At the dry cleaner.

In a country in which people only want boys, every family continues to have children until they have a boy. If they have a girl, they have another child. If they have a boy, they stop. What is the proportion of boys to girls in the country?

Like a zillion to one.

In fact, I would like to move there.

Just where is this land you speak of??

Design an evacuation plan for San Francisco.

RUN.

(Fast!)

You’re the captain of a pirate ship, and your crew gets to vote on how the gold is divided up. If fewer than half of the pirates agree with you, you die. How do you recommend apportioning the gold in such a way that you get a good share of the booty, but still survive?

It depends.

If I found the gold I would just not return to the ship and therefore I would be rich and also not dead.

If someone else found the gold, I would suggest that we apportion it in the way that is least likely to result in my death.

What is the probability of breaking a stick into 3 pieces and forming a triangle?

I am going to need some sticks for this one.

Do you have any sticks?

Why are manhole covers round?

Do I look like a man to you??

I could not possibly be qualified to answer this question.

I have no idea how they think.

They are a complete and utter mystery to me.

What was the question again?

How many golf balls can fit in a school bus?

Are there kids on the bus?

Is the driver on the bus?

Is this a field trip and so there are chaperones on the bus? They take up more space, you know.

Is it music class day and so the kids have all their instruments with them?

Or is the football team on the bus with all their equipment?

I have no idea.

You might want to rethink this question.

Tagged as: Cartoon by Hugh, Do you want this job or not, I need a job, Stephanie A. Lloyd, Yes I am actually being serious

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