Cartoon by Hugh MacLeod
A friend of mine said something rather profound to me today.
“Be angry over what you can control.”
Which, once I started thinking about it all made me really mad, to be honest with you; because when I think about all that makes me angry…NONE of it is within my control.
If I could control it I would change it, and if I can change it then it doesn’t make me angry anymore.
See how this works?
So he encouraged me to write about this, and so here I am, and yet I don’t know where to go with it.
So I guess I will just throw this out to you.
Is there something that makes you angry but is within your control?
And if that is the case then WHY AREN’T YOU DOING SOMETHING ABOUT IT?
And, really; the bigger question is…what do you do about the stuff that makes you angry that you do not have any control over??
I am trying to figure this one out.
I’m at a complete and utter loss.
I really like the concept…just can’t wrap my brain around how to make it work for me.
Help.
Scridb filter
{ 7 comments }
Is it against blogging rules if I comment on my own post?
Well, whatever. It’s my blog, dammit, so I guess I can do whatever I want.
Anyway.
I just had a thought.
While I can’t necessarily control everything that makes me mad, I CAN control how I deal with said situations in my life.
I am thinking that therein lies the answer.
The wise man who suggested that you should only worry over things you can directly control is correct. But a fool.
We all get angry at things we can’t control. We are humans. But we can decide how we will respond to situations, especially if we can anticipate and manage expectations.
And if you learn how to do that, please please please tell me how!
“But we can decide how we will respond to situations”
Ahem, Wise Man…
I think that is precisely the key to all of this.
I get angry at myself for getting angry about the things that I cannot control…
The largest struggle that I’ve faced over the years is to convince myself that it is fine to be a “work in progress.”
I’ve overcome this struggle, so as a result, I tackle what I can control, keep an eye on what I cannot control with the understanding that I may come across a way to solve something that is out of my hands and turn the rest over to God.
This philosphy has actually strengthened my faith and allowed me to sleep better at night.
“it is fine to be a “work in progress”
Jeff,
What a great point, and thank you for the reminder that perhaps it’s ok to ease up on oneself every once in a while…
Stephanie
I think ‘angry,’ as used here, is really an antonym for ‘complacent.’ Bad habits can sneak up on you, such as gaining weight slowly or letting your desk get cluttered. Most such things can be easily corrected, and quick corrections, such as cleaning off your desk, can build confidence to stick with things that can’t be done quickly, such as losing weight.
Correcting little but important things is a great confidence booster. I think most people would be served well by taking a close look at small things that can be improved quickly.
Hi Stephanie – This is a great post and great discussion. One of my mentors once told me that most of my frustrations come from me assuming that all of the rules in a situation apply to me. When I am able to view situations without any of the rules, I become enough of a hero for coming up with new ways to solve a problem that I get forgiveness for taking control and ignoring or breaking the rules.
I wish I could make myself do this more often…
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