I read an article in CNN Money, which cited 80% of 2009 college graduates going straight back home to live with their parents. I’m one of these “boomerang kids;” we moved over our tassels then moved right back home to mom and pop. It’s not an ideal position, but I haven’t lost my pride… yet.
THE PERKS
- Saving money. Obviously, the free rent is a big plus, but I’ve recently realized just how much money I’m saving at home. It’s the little things; stamps, printer paper and ink, toothpaste, laundry detergent and toilet paper are all available to me at no cost. Those necessities are well stocked in an established home.
- Company. Even if you considered yourself pretty independent in college, you likely had roommates. It’s a completely different experience to live alone. I’ve known several people who tried and couldn’t take the solitude. Mom and dad may not be the perfect roommates, but I always have someone around to talk to and don’t have to be paranoid at night.
- Home cooking. I don’t eat at home every night, but having (southern) family meals available to me is another big money saver. Better than that, I get a nutritious meal (as opposed to all those Hot Pockets I was eating between classes), which helps me stay healthy. Illness is not conducive to productivity.
THE BUMMERS
- Feelings of shame. I’m not sure about the rest of you, but to me, there’s something a little depressing about a large, elegant diploma frame hanging in your childhood bedroom next to that “Most Likely to Succeed” plaque from high school and a pile of neglected Beanie Babies. I refuse to endure that kind of torture. My diploma has two options: my new apartment or my corner office.
- No privacy. In college, I became very accustomed to doing things my way and in my own time. Back at home, I’ve reverted back to disclosing my daily schedule and hoping for parental approval. You know what it’s like—checking in on your way home, letting your parents know if you’ll be out “too late.” Though they have lightened up a bit since high school, my parents know where I am almost all the time. It’s not the worst thing that could happen, but it’s not adulthood.
- Financial dependence. When someone has a financial stake in your actions, they have an opinion on everything. There’s nothing wrong with that in principle, but when mom tells me I can’t buy a Brita Pitcher with the money I earned, it does become a bit irritating. Parents seem to think you want to mooch off them your whole life. Incorrect! I would genuinely love to take over all my bills (and I’m making progress), but like most things in my life right now, it’s going to take time.
- The commute. Depending on where you find a place, this could be an issue regardless. For me, driving from my home in the suburbs into the city of Atlanta for work has done quite a number on my gas bill (not to mention my sanity in the midst of Atlanta rush hour).
THE SOLUTION
- Keep yourself busy. I have made it illogical to think of myself as a failure because I am constantly working both at my day job and on numerous freelance projects. Living with my parents doesn’t seem so shameful if I’m a contributing member of society.
- Set goals. Whether it’s finding an affordable apartment by November or saving up for an exercise machine, have something to work toward. Short-term, attainable goals are the best way to keep from feeling stagnant.
- Talk it out. After a few arguments, my parents and I sat down and had a little chat about my difficulty dealing with being back under their wing. We came up with a way to live compatibly in a way that meets their needs but still gives me space and relative independence.
- Remember, it’s only temporary. It’s hard to keep this in mind, especially when “temporary” remains an undefined span of time. Make moving out a priority. Don’t rush into it, but make sure it’s a long-term goal supported by your short-term decisions.
The transition has been difficult, but it helps to know a large majority of my peers are right here with me, searching for a place to hang that new diploma.
[To learn more about my post-grad exploits, visit my Web site.]
{ 2 trackbacks }
Comments on this entry are closed.